My young adult has left the Church (part 1)

This is a little series of posts I put out in 2010, at the time they were helpful for a number of people, I hope that continues to be true today.

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Over the past many months I have been approached by several parents of young adults who have, in some form or fashion, rejected the Church or the Christian religion in some form. I am sure it is because I am of the same cohort of their child or because I am a minister or these parents love their child or (more likely) a combination of reasons, these wonderful parents ask for guidance. After many conversations with parents who tell me the same story (albeit with different characters and little nuances) it has given me cause to write down what I have been sharing with these parents. This is not a formula on "how to get your kid back in church". Nor is it by any means going to be 100% effective in all situations, but generally speaking, I have found these steps to be a good starting point for these parents (or so they have shared with me).

1) If you have a child who is leaving church or religion, do not panic. This may be difficult to do in the moment, but panic is a reaction and in a "status update/twitter" world, reactions are all young people get and know how to fuel (with more shock). Do not panic.

This might be enough for right now. Check back in two days and I will post the other actions I have found to be helpful for adults who find themselves at a loss with their young adult.

The Bible is not Meant to be Read

I have been told that the Bible is boring. Maybe it is. I have a difficult time seeing how a book that is thousands of years old is not boring. Telling the story of how I brush my teeth is boring, it is why no one writes down all their teeth brushing experiences. Perhaps the Bible is boring because we are no longer surprised by the Bible.

We know about Adam blaming Eve, Samson’s flowing locks and strength,  Jonah’s resentment, Jacob’s sneakiness, Esther's courage, Peter's denial, Paul's conversion. We just are not surprised when Easter is celebrated.

Allow me to let you in on a little secret that might sound a little crazy and even hyperbole, but it is something that changed my life. Here it is:

If you are reading the bible, you are doing it wrong. The bible is not meant to be read.

The bible is boring when you read it. We treat it like a movie that we have seen countless times. We think of the bible as like another media source and so it is something we read, something we consume, like any other book or movie. When we read it once we feel like we do after we watch a movie, we tell everyone that we have seen that. I is and have no deep desire to see it again.

You are not supposed to read the Bible, the Bible is supposed to read you.

It is collection of writings that we open ourselves up to in order to be convinced and shaped or formed. It is a living book that invites us to see that blaming another is not limited to Adam, that we too harbor resentment, that you and I manipulate others for our benefit, that Esther's courage is our courage and that we are Peter and we are Paul. These are not characters locked in the past or on a page. These are the stories of our lives today.

When we read the Bible, we are not surprised because we already know the ending. However, when we allow the Bible to read us, the surprises are never ending.

Thank you

For the past seven years I have been keeping this little blog. Over the years there  have been a number of highlights from reaching my first 100 subscribers, being tweeted by Nadia Bolz-Weber, curating the first "Be The Change" ebook, launching Imprints, getting email feedback, being reminded weekly of my poor grammar and experiencing internet trolls.

The best thing about this blog that I have experienced is when someone says, "I was reading on your blog..." Many times I don't know what they are talking about because I forget what is posted each time, but I am always humbled when I hear that. 

Thank you for reading this entry and for encouraging me these past seven years. It is my prayer that I will continue to be provoked by God to always be the Change.